


Something Shepard

by narayu



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-17
Updated: 2013-09-13
Packaged: 2017-12-20 11:18:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/886627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/narayu/pseuds/narayu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU Drabbles in which Shenko go to high school.<br/>At a Vancouver highschool, there seem to be two main groups of people: The "cool kids" who go to parties and have relationships and think making fun of each other is friendship. And the "outcasts" who cut class and smoke between classes and don't really care about life. Kaidan didn't fit into either, and he was semi-content with that. Then the new girl came to town.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was just something that kept intruding on my daydreams so I decided to write it out.  
> Will be expanding on it later.

There were things that he knew were no brainers.

That the first three Star Wars movies were so much better than the "prequels." The fact bread tasted better with nutella on it. That he was going to ace his biology test tomorrow because he'd double and triple checked the chapters.

Other things were a little less certain. Like why other kids in his school were so obsessed with being the first to notice a good band, movie, or book. Like what it was like to travel outside of Vancouver. Like what it felt like to kiss a girl.

The great mysteries of life, this is what Kaidan was pondering in home room on a Thursday in the middle of the school year when his teacher announced that they were going to have a new student. He had been half daydreaming and only heard the tail end of the introduction. "…. Shepard, please make her feel welcome."

The girl named something Shepard was pretty with messy red hair and she was walking right toward him. Kaidan started to panic because one of life's great mysteries he'd never quite figured out was how to talk to girls.

She was looking down at her feet while he was counting her freckles and she looked up and stared at him with striking green eyes. Kaidan felt the blush coloring his cheeks.

"Hey." The new girl said casually - right to Kaidan.

"Uh… hey." He said, hoping the blush had faded from his face. The right side of her mouth pulled up ever so slightly in a smirk and she took her seat in front of him.

He had some trouble focusing on his Biology test that day.

 

* * *

 

Walking home from school had a tendency to go one of two ways.

On a good day he would be left alone to walk in peace the ten blocks that stretched between his high school and his neighborhood.

On a bad day he would be bombarded with shouts from the windows of cars filled with the "cool kids" berating him about how he was a nerd, or a virgin, or some other word that meant something Kaidan was and they were not.

Today would be a bad day, Kaidan thought, as a blue Audi drove slowly past him carrying John Fredricks and his latest female conquest.

"Alenko! What's it like knowing no girl will ever let you touch her?"

Fredricks wasn't the brightest, and it wasn't even funny, but the girl in his passenger seat was laughing as if he just said the most hilarious thing in the world.

Kaidan put his head down and kept walking when he heard another voice.

"Hey cool guy in the Audi! What's it like knowing every girl you touch is just letting you fuck them out of pity?"

Kaidan didn't look back to Fredricks, he was busy focusing intently on his shoes when he slammed into something. He looked up, blinking at the new girl… something Shepard… and it took him a moment to realize she had been the one that came to his defense. And then she kissed him right on the lips.

She turned back to Fredricks who was still driving slowly next to the sidewalk where they were walking, apparently too stunned that someone - no  _a girl_ someone - had countered his insult.

"Now leave my boyfriend alone, jackass, or I'll tell everyone in school about that STD you gave me!"

The girl in the passenger seat gasped and Fredricks threw a string of curses Shepard's way before speeding off.

Kaidan knew he was blushing and the heat in his cheeks was partly because this girl just kissed him. And she was  _beautiful_. And he didn't even have to ask her. But he was also embarrassed that he had to be rescued by a  _girl_.

She was still standing in front of him and he couldn't keep walking but he didn't know what to say either so he just kind of stared at her ear, afraid to look her in the eye.

"Hey." She said, repeating her first greeting from earlier that day.

He looked up at her, and he was sure the confusion was apparent in his face but she didn't offer any kind of explanation.

"Um.. thanks.." he said, but he could hear the tension in his voice. "You didn't have to do that, I'm sure Fredricks is going to find some way to make it worse."

She was smirking, and his cheeks flushed again. She shrugged one shoulder and stepped out of the way so he could keep walking but she didn't make any move to leave herself.

"Well," he started, feeling like he needed to say something by way of a goodbye.

"Yeah, I should go," she said, saving him from embarrassing himself in some way that he knew he was bound to do. "See ya, Alenko."

He blinked at her again, frustrated with himself and his inability to say  _anything_  to this girl.

"Uh, yeah, ok," he said, running a hand through his hair. "Later, Shepard."


	2. Chapter 2

 

Kaidan usually spent Saturday afternoons at the library. It was partially because his mom hosted her book club on Saturdays at their house and there was nothing worse than five middle aged women asking him a million questions about his life. It was also partially because Tali was usually there.

 

 

Tali and Kaidan had been best friends since grade school. They were both overachievers when it came to school and at a young age Kaidan had come to Tali’s rescue when she was being bullied by some older kids. They were inseparable after that. A few years back they had started a weekend custom of meeting at the library since Tali was three years younger than Kaidan and they weren’t in the same school. Now, Tali was a freshman but they still kept up their Saturday tradition. A lot of the time they would just read or study or do homework in comfortable silence. Sometimes they’d play games on their laptops or just talk about whatever was going on in their lives since the previous meeting. Tali was like the sister Kaidan never had, and the only person he considered a true friend.

 

“So.... still using that old Macbook, Kaidan?” Tali asked as she approached the table where Kaidan had set himself up with his laptop and books. This was a topic that came up frequently and it was a victor-less argument.

 

“This computer is a top-of-the-line model, Tali.” he rolled his eyes as she sat down across from him, bringing out her brand new Nomad and opening it up on the table.

 

“Not when it comes to gaming, or multitasking, you’ve got to get out from under that rock.” she said, shaking her head at him.

 

“I don’t need a custom laptop for gaming. I’m not sitting out in public playing counterstrike anyway. This computer is simple and user friendly and it does everything I need it to.” he replied.

Tali let out an exaggerated sigh before they fell into their usual silence.

 

After a while, when they had both finished their work and Tali was done showing him the opening sequence for some new futuristic RPG, they slipped into easy conversation about school. Tali was really enjoying her Freshman year, which was a relief because she had been pretty nervous in the beginning. Kaidan suspected she had probably been apprehensive because of her earlier bullying experiences. But Tali wasn’t the little girl with a mouth guard and glasses carrying 500-page books around the playground at recess. She had grown into a very pretty girl and her mom had allowed her to get contacts last year and her technical skills rivaled those of the the computer teacher at the high school. He had told her as much, and she’d scoffed at him as though he didn’t know what he was talking about. Sure enough, though, she fit into the high school scene almost seamlessly, better than Kaidan ever had.

 

“So did you hear about the new Freshman?” Tali was asking him, still staring down at her game while her character was shooting at some sort of machine-like alien. “Apparently she’s super smart, taking all Junior classes, and they ended up putting her in a Junior home room on the first day by mistake.” she shrugged, still not looking at him. “She’s in mine now, seems okay I guess, quiet.”

 

Kaidan was confused, could she be talking about Shepard? She couldn’t be a Freshman, could she? She had been in some of the same classes as him - Bio and Trig - and they were both advanced classes even for Juniors. “Did you catch her name?” he asked his friend, trying to sound uninterested.

 

Tali raised an eyebrow and finally looked at him, she didn’t miss anything. “She goes by Shepard, she apparently asked all the teachers to use her last name. Weird huh?” she was studying him carefully this time, and he tried to keep his features blank.

 

“Hmm, yeah,” he mumbled; “You’re sure she’s a Freshman?”

 

“Kaidan Alenko, you’re almost 17 years old, don’t go hitting on a Freshman, okay?” she lectured.

 

“What? I... I wouldn’t hit on her! I just... I saw her in home room and she didn’t look that young is all.” Kaidan stammered, frowning at the annoyance on Tali’s face. She knew him better than anyone, why would she think he’d hit on this girl?

 

Tali giggled and he relaxed a bit. “Lighten up, I’m only joking, as if you’d have the balls to hit on her anyway - she’s way too cool for you.” she teased, kicking him under the table. Kaidan rolled his eyes again.

 

When he looked back to Tali she was refocused on her game, but she said casually - “I’ll see if I can find anything out about her, she’s in my home room and my gym class.” she shrugged again. “Who knows, maybe she likes quiet nerdy types who like outdated technology.” She looked up at him again with feigned enthusiasm. “Hell, maybe we’ll actually get you a girlfriend for once!”

 

Kaidan groaned and Tali giggled again. She was going to get him into trouble one of these days, he just knew it.


	3. Chapter 3

On Monday at school, Kaidan was distracted by a pop quiz in Trig and being roped into set design for the spring musical. He was a pretty talented artist, or at least that’s what people told him, and the drama club always asked him to work on design rather than act. That was okay, Kaidan thought, he wasn’t much of an actor anyway, and he hated public speaking.

He was still thinking about the sets when he walked out of the school, mentally sketching some ideas to put to paper when he got home. When he looked up, he noticed Shepard was sitting on the half wall by the curb in front of the school waiting for him. Pfft, he thought. Who was he kidding? She was definitely not sitting there waiting for him.

 

But regardless of his doubts, she turned as he approached and greeted him with a smile.

“Alenko, wanna walk me home?” she asked.  
He looked at her dumbstruck for a moment before realizing that Fredericks and his new girl - a different one from the previous week - was getting into his car just ten feet away. This was another pity move, and Kaidan wondered why this girl cared so much that she’d go out of her way to put on a show for students in a school she just started to attend. She was a decent actor though, he mused - looking at the genuine interest that seemed to glow from her face as she looked at him, perhaps he should suggest for her to try out for the musical.

Shepard hopped off of the wall and grabbed the few books that had been sitting next to her - no purse or backpack, he noticed - and stood staring at him expectantly. Finally, figuring he probably looked like an idiot standing there not saying anything, he took the hand she had offered him and they began walking. It felt almost normal, two people walking together as a couple hand-in-hand, but Kaidan was still completely confused about this strange girl and her charity and thought he should probably get around to talking to her about it at some point. No time like the present.

“So, uh, what brings you to Vancouver?” he asked her as casually as he could muster, keeping his eyes straight ahead and hoping his hands wouldn’t begin to sweat.

“Typical army brat,” she shrugged, he felt it by the way her hand pulled up slightly. “We move around a lot, my parents are separated, and I live with my dad. He just got stationed here - Jericho beach.” she said, seemingly unaffacted by the topic or of her parents separation. Kaidan wasn’t really sure how to respond to that.

“Oh, um, sorry to hear about that... your parents, I mean.” he replied and was startled when she stopped walking. He finally looked at her, ready to apologize some more when she released his hand to hold hers up - telling him to stop.

“Look, Alenko, you seem like a nice kid and all and I’m sure you mean well but I don’t need anybody’s pity, okay?” she told him, not in a way that sounded like she was chiding him, but in a way that sounded like someone explaining tennyson to someone who didn’t read poetry - just a lesson in how it was - and he found himself nodding along before he realized she’d misspoke.

“Kid?” he asked incredulously. “I’m older than you!”

The corner of her mouth turned up, a look he was getting so wonderfully used to, and she pivoted on her feet to face him fully, placing a hand on her hip.

“Is that so, Alenko?” she asked teasingly, her eyes holding his with provocation.

And then he wasn't sure. When he looked at her, he didn’t see a 14 year old girl. She looked older - not necessarily her body, but her eyes shone with something like wisdom or worldliness, something that someone her age wouldn’t possess. Something that Kaidan himself didn’t possess.

“Uh, I just mean..” he stammered, looking down at his feet.

She took pity on him then, clasping her hand in his once again and continuing forward.

“I know, I’m only 14. But if it helps, I’ve travelled through most of Canada, a lot of the United States, and even some of Europe.” she explained, falling casually back into their earlier pace - walking together like a couple that had been doing this daily. “Hell, I’ve been to 12 schools in the last 10 years.”

Kaidan wondered how someone could possibly keep up a social life or even a normal family life while moving around so much. Well he guessed you couldn’t, that’s why her parents were separated. It must be lonely.

“Sometimes you meet friends that survive any distance, and with facetime and skype I’m never really lonely.” she said, making him wonder if he’d spoken aloud or if she was just a mind reader. He glanced over and she was smiling at him, but her eyes were sad. “It can take a toll though, it can be difficult to motivate myself to meet new people because I figure I’ll eventually leave anyway.”

Her voice brightened a bit, “but the good news is because I overcompensate and try to read and take online tests between moves to keep up with school work, I’ve actually taken most freshman and sophomore classes already so your school is letting me take advanced science and math!”

He considered that for a moment, he and Tali had wondered why Shepard was a freshman in junior classes and now he knew why, but something about it was bugging him.

“So... if you have taken so many extra classes, why not skip a grade?” he asked her as they turned the corner just before his house. She looked thoughtful, as though she wasn’t sure how to answer the question or maybe wasn’t sure if she wanted to tell him the answer.

Finally she shrugged again, “Sometimes the credits from my other schools count, sometimes the online work counts, sometimes none of it counts. Regardless, your school would have let me enter in as a sophomore... but there was an... incident at my old school, and I was held back.” she explained. “But what’s your story? Tali says you are an artist?” she asked with barely a pause, making it clear that she didn’t want to talk anymore about her ‘incident’ and it was time to change the subject. He made a mental note to ask Tali what else she'd said to the new girl later.

They were in front of his house now and without thinking he said “Well, I can show you some of my work, if you’d like - “ he motioned to the house “this is my house, wanna come in?”

She tilted her head to the side and looked at him for a minute before shaking her head.

“I can’t, not today, maybe some other time though.” she said, smiling again.

Kaidan felt deflated, even though the invitation was a fluke and he was sure his mom would have had a heart attack if he walked in the house with a girl and a girl who was holding his hand no less. He nodded, and made an effort to look like he was very interested in the rock he was kicking around with his foot.

He sighed, “So - where’s your house? You wanted me to walk you home?”

She shrugged again, “Nah - we’re close enough,” she said turning to walk away. “I’ll see you in Bio tomorrow.”

He flushed with anger suddenly and grabbed her wrist before she turned away completely. He wasn’t holding it hard, but still released it immediately when she snapped her head back to look at him, frowning.

“Shepard, you don’t need to pretend to be my damn girlfriend, okay? I don’t need anybody's pity either.” he spat at her, surprised at the venom in his own voice. He shoved his hands in his pockets and avoided her gaze.

She didn’t move but also didn’t say anything for a long time, so he carefully lifted his eyes to meet hers again. Her mouth was twisted in a scowl and he was about to apologize when she spoke.

“Sure thing, Alenko.” she said - calmly, her voice not matching the look on her face, “whatever you want.” And with that she turned and walked away, leaving Kaidan to stare after her stupidly.


	4. Chapter 4

****

It started out just like any other afternoon.

****

It had been a few weeks since the day Kaidan had walked Shepard home from school. She had been avoiding him in both of their classes, no longer saying hi in the mornings and avoiding eye contact with him whenever she saw him in the hall. He didn’t see her after school either, so she either left before or after him to begin her walk home.

****

For his part, Kaidan was avoiding her too, though not as successfully. He found himself staring at the back of her head in Bio, hoping she’d turn around and say... something, even if it was just to tease him for being a nerdy virgin like some other kids did. He found himself noticing her scent - a faint mixture of lavender and soap - and noticing its absence when she wasn’t near him. This girl had gotten under his skin and she wanted nothing to do with him, it was depressing.

****

Today he was thinking of other things. It was mid-March and unseasonably warm so he decided to go to the park after school. Vancouver didn’t have many early spring days that leant to the possibility of sitting outside and enjoying the weather, he meant to make the most of it.

****

When he got to the park, Kaidan found a spot that had enough light to allow him to read and he settled in against a large tree. He pulled out his copy of George Orwell’s 1984 - which he was reading for the 5th time - and relaxed. He could lose himself in this dystopian (past) future that Orwell had created, and while he’d never want to actually get lost in Oceania, it was still an entertaining and thought-provoking imagining of the future and he never tired of reading it.

****

Winston was just telling Julia that he hated purity and goodness and wanted everyone to be corrupt when Kaidan caught the scent of lavender and soap on a breeze. His heart raced and he felt like a foolish child for being so affected by a mere scent that meant nothing. Despite his inner scolding, he looked around for her - attempting to appear nonchalant but surely failing. He saw her half skipping over to a bench no more than 10 meters away from his tree, headphone wires trailing from her ears to the right pocket of her grey hoodie.

****

She hadn’t seen him - not yet - and he took a moment to watch her. She was moving to whatever beat was echoing in her ears, and when she got to the bench she dropped her backpack on the grass, sat down, pulled out her iPod, and tapped on the screen a few times before replacing it in her pocket. He saw her pull a book out of the pack and though he couldn’t see the title from where he was sitting, he could tell it was a well-read book by the wear on the cover and spine. She smiled a little as she read, still swaying to the music he couldn’t hear, her red hair brushing against her neck and her feet tapping on the ground.

****

Kaidan sighed. He wished he had the guts to go over and talk to her. He didn’t know what he’d say. ‘Sorry I snapped at you, I know you don’t like me but maybe we could be friends?’ No. ‘I’m still upset that you thought I needed your charity but I think you’re pretty, let’s make out?’ Definitely not. ‘Hey... Shepard, could we maybe start over?’ Maybe. Too bad he didn’t have the guts to get up and walk over to her.

****

Her mouth turned down in a frown and he hadn’t realized he’d even been staring at it until he met her eyes and saw that he’d been caught. He felt the blush rise in his cheeks and tried to make an apologetic face before hiding it in his book again. It was no use, he heard her pick up her backpack and knew he’d freaked her out and scared her away from the park. Which was why he almost jumped out of his skin when she said his name from mere steps away.

****

“Kaidan.” She said as a statement, a greeting.

****

He looked up at her and her face was unreadable, devoid of any kind of emotion or clue as to what she was thinking. He sighed again, thinking of some way to apologize for staring at her moments before.

****

“Shepard, hey... I - sorry - didn’t mean to freak you out or anything, was just reading my book -” he started, staring down at her feet, lifting his book slightly to emphasize his story.

****

She interrupted him - “Yeah, I see, 1984.”

****

He looked up to see her motioning with her own book, by the same title, and he managed a half smile, which - to his growing surprise - she returned.

****

“Uh,” he rubbed a hand over his forehead, searching for something to say. “Do you.. wanna sit here?” he asked, finally. Stupid question, he thought. Of course she doesn’t.

****

“Sure.” she said brightly, plopping down beside him against the tree and he gaped at her for a minute, not believing it. Shepard chuckled at his expression, and Kaidan let the sound wrap around him. Maybe she didn’t like him, but he still found himself wanting her company.

****

They talked about the book for a few minutes, Shepard had just started her tenth read, Kaidan was halfway through his fifth. Shepard liked the lack of description in the book, leading you to imagine your own scenery for the most part. Kaidan liked the technological advancements that were mentioned - even if they were being used for mind control and surveillance. Shepard thought of Winston as an intellectual rebel, Kaidan referred to Julia as a physical rebel - Shepard teased him for having his mind in the gutter and then laughed when he blushed at her playful mockery.

****

Soon they fell into a comfortable silence, both reading their individual copies of the same book. They sat there that way for a half hour when Shepard pulled the headphones out of her pocket and placed one earbud in her left ear and the other in Kaidan’s right. When she pressed play it was Max Richter - a composer and one he’d listened to many times on his own - and Kaidan sighed happily as he turned his attention back to the book.

****

He realized they had been sitting there for hours when the light dimmed to the point where he could barely make out the words on the pages of his book. It seemed that Shepard noticed the change at the same time because she sat up straighter causing the earbud to fall from his ear.

****

“Whoops, sorry.” she said with a half shrug as she gathered the cords and the ipod and tossed them into her pack followed by her book. “I should go, didn’t realize how late it was getting.” she smiled at him and stood up, slinging the bag on her shoulder. To Kaidan’s surprise she offered him a hand, which he took and was  on his feet in an instant, marvelling at the strength of such a small girl.

****

“Thanks, yeah I should get going too, mom will be mad if I miss dinner.” he replied, releasing her hand to brush the grass off of his legs. He considered inviting her over again but thought better of it, no need to ruin a nice afternoon with the sting of disappointment. She was staring at him when he looked back up at her, expression unreadable again, and he was at a loss for words - again. Thankfully, she saved him from thinking of any - again.

****

“Okay, well... see ya.” she said with a small wave before turning to walk away toward the park’s entrance.

 **  
**“Yeah.. bye.” he said lamely, before gathering his own backpack and his sweatshirt and heading home.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard is full of surprises. Kaidan is full of shock and awe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter came right in time for Kaidan Porn Week on tumblr!

Spring seemed to fly by while Kaidan wasn’t looking. Time flies when you’re having fun, the saying went, and he was having the time of his life.

 

After that day at the park, he found himself at the same tree anytime the weather permitted. At least half the time, Shepard would show up too. He tried to convince himself he wasn’t that disappointed when she didn’t, but he was sure the ridiculous grin on his face gave him away when she did.

 

It was an unspoken arrangement - unspoken being the key word, since their afternoons were spent mostly reading and listening to music with little conversation between them - that they would meet by the tree and stay until dusk. They had finished 1984 weeks ago and had moved onto Animal Farm, Macbeth, and now Lord of the Flies. That was one of their conversations, he mused, which book to start next. They would have small conversations about the characters from time to time, and ever since learning they were reading the same book that first day in the park, they had decided to keep up with the tradition.

 

April was almost over and the beginning of summer weather was fighting with the end of spring, causing a mix of warm air and cool breeze. The sun was nice but he thought it was still cool enough that he was glad he brought a sweatshirt.

 

When he got to the tree, she was already there. This was a first - Kaidan was always the first to arrive during their afternoons together - but he didn’t think too much into it when she looked up at him with a brilliant smile. She was wearing jeans and a dark brown sweater, her hair was drifting around her neck in a slow dance with each shift in the air and he could smell the familiar scent of lavender as he approached their tree. She already had an earbud in her ear, the other hanging loose waiting for him to take his place next to her, and her book was resting in her lap not yet open.

 

Kaidan wondered why he always felt so nervous - something stirring in his stomach when he was near her - even though they had been getting together here for weeks. When he reached her side, he noticed that she was sitting on a blanket - another first. She didn’t say anything, but smoothed the blanket out next to the tree and leaned back so she was laying down. He knew her intention was for him to lay down next to her and he felt a new wave of anxiety washing over him. Innocent afternoon in the park, he reminded himself. They hadn’t so much as held hands since that first day he had walked her home. At this point he assumed they were... what... friends? But he still didn’t even know her first name and they still hadn’t even spoken about the awkward beginnings of their acquaintance. Nevertheless, he settled down on the blanket next to her, and she placed the other half of the headphones in his right ear.

 

Today’s music selection was some kind of electronic noise that he’d never heard. It was something that might have someday grown into dubstep if given a little umph but it was mellower and he realized after a long time that neither of them were actually reading, just listening and watching the clouds above them. It was peaceful, which was strange considering the invasion of sounds in his ear was anything but. The music had a peculiar effect on Kaidan’s body, it was a mixture of strings and bass and heavy beats and he felt his pulse race as the songs crescendoed He stole a glance to his right and Shepard’s eyes were wide and thoughtful, not seeming to focus on any one thing and yet flitting over the underside of the trees and the clouds and an airplane in the distance. Kaidan sighed. He wasn’t sure what it was about her, but just being in proximity to Shepard made him feel better.

 

For a moment, the sun came through the trees at an angle that burned right into his eyes, and Kaidan brought his arm up to shield himself from it. After a few seconds it passed behind a cloud and he lowered his hand back down to the stretch of blanket between them. Except.. he missed. His hand was on Shepard’s thigh and he yanked it away, embarrassed as the color began to flush to his cheeks. He didn’t dare look at her, but murmured something that was meant to be an apology. He heard her respond with a chuckle, muted slightly by the ever-present bass in his ear, and before he could say anything else she had grasped his arm and placed it back against her leg. He looked at her finally, wide-eyed and confused, and she maintained a smirk on her face as she adjusted her body so they were hip to hip. She curled her other arm around his and held it in place on her thigh and Kaidan could feel the warmth of her skin through the denim in her jeans. It caused a reaction in him that made him endlessly relieved that he was wearing loose khakis. She hadn’t broken their eye contact and he knew she could see the color in his cheeks but all he could focus on was the way her lips parted ever so slightly. Her eyes were darker than normal and he was sure that meant something but he didn’t know what.

 

Finally she turned her head to look back at the sky and he wanted to do the same but he was mesmerized by her. He watched her chest rise and fall with every breath and he thought he could make out the pulse point in her neck and then she closed her eyes and...

 

...she arched her back and Kaidan’s hand moved between her legs almost of their own accord yet he was aware she must have moved it there. He held his breath watching her, waiting for some indication that he had done something wrong or that he should move away but he knew he would get nothing of the sort. She had a firm grip on his arm and she was holding him there, her breathing seeming to change, waiting for him to make a move. But he couldn’t. He was frozen there, staring at her, watching her body barely move with the simple act of breathing. He swept his gaze up to her face and her eyes were still closed but she whispered his name.

 

“Kaidan,” he marveled at the sound, it was so foreign, so... sexual... “Put your head back again.” she ordered, and he complied.

 

When his eyes were averted from her body she moved again, arching her back and pulling his hand against her in one movement. With the sight of her out of his vision, he was bolder, accepting her encouragement, squeezing her thigh as she moved slowly against him. He didn’t have a clue what to do, there wasn’t a user manual for this kind of thing and he had definitely never done it before. The porn that James sometimes sent him didn’t have anything to do with over the clothes stuff. He thought maybe he could figure out what to do if they were naked... but this was completely different.

 

The music was still thrumming in his ear but he could hear her breathing, more ragged, as she pulled his arm against her, wordlessly telling him how to touch her here. He got the hint and moved his fingers against the apex of her thighs. It wasn’t easy, her legs were close together, not allowing for much movement but when his fingers pressed against the seam of her jeans where the zipper disappeared between her legs he heard her gasp and something in his groin twitched. A strangled sound came from his throat completely of its own accord and he felt the color rush to his cheeks again. He realized suddenly that they were still in the park and he looked around frantically to make sure no one was watching.

 

“Kaidan,” she said again, lower than before, a breathy sound that wound into his gut and made him want her to say it over and over. He didn’t look at her again, afraid he’d lose his nerve and stop this.. whatever it was that they were doing. “No one is looking, and if they do, all they’ll see is two people laying on a blanket listening to music.. harmless.” she said, her voice breaking on the last word as she arched against him again. She was right, he realized, they were barely moving and to the passerby it would just look like they were enjoying the afternoon, maybe even sleeping.

 

 

He knew better. He knew that the tiniest movement of his fingers against her would cause her to gasp again, knew that it was bringing about some sensation inside of her that he didn’t quite understand but didn’t want to question because she wanted him to do this for her, something he was sure she could do herself if she wanted to. So he did, he put pressure on the same spot as before and she... moaned....

 

 

It wasn’t loud, and it wasn’t like the videos he’d seen, but that’s the word for the sound she made. She arched against his hand again, simultaneously pulling at it with her own hand and the movement was slow and deliberate on her part and she knew what she was doing while he was flailing in a sea of unknowing. He was hard, and he wanted to touch himself like he did when he was alone in his room, but he couldn’t do that here, never here, never in the open, never next to Shepard.

 

There was a rhythm to this thing they were doing and he was beginning to understand it, he applied pressure where she guided him with her hand, she arched her back so that her hips met his probing, her breath caught and her breathing became irregular. He stole a glance at her when another small moan escaped her lips. Her eyes were no longer closed, she was looking at him and her eyes were shining with something that he instinctively classified as need and they were dark and her eyelids were drooping not in tiredness but in something else so that her eyes were half closed. Her cheeks were flushed and her lips were open in what looked like a whistle but all he heard was her ragged breathing. He tore his gaze away from her lips and watched her hips move. It was so subtle, such a small movement to cause such a reaction. That thought was met with another quiet sound that made Kaidan’s body want to grind into... something... his hand.. Shepard... something. But he was stuck in this moment, feeling the sensation of wanting to run home to his room and relieve himself of his hard-on but also not wanting to ever leave this blanket in this park or this girl and the space between her thighs.

 

Her eyes slid closed when he looked back to her face and she pulled roughly against his wrist, hips bucking harder to meet his hand and - catching her intention - he pushed against her with the same intensity and was rewarded when she breathed his name. He sighed at the sound of it again and noticed his breath was also rough. She opened her eyes to look at him again, and there was some kind of comprehension in her gaze. He knew what it was a moment later when she did three things...

 

She held his stare with an unknown force.

She held his hand still against her and moved her hips, showing him the exact right angle.

And she said his name again, rough and throaty and amazing.

 

No one had ever said his name like that, and Kaidan knew then that the sound of his name from anyone else’s lips would never affect him like this.

 

She released his hand and he continued the motions the way she had taught him, watching her lips part further as she moved a hand to his leg. He thought she was close when she slid her hand into his pocket and squeezed against his hip bone in a motion that seemed unintentional, but somehow brought on by what he was doing to her. The possibility of that made him even harder and yet all he could think about was the way he was making her feel. Her hand brushed against him through his pants pocket and he flinched for a moment, not used to anyone touching him there except himself. He looked in her eyes and she repeated the motion. He couldn’t do this here, he remembered, though he knew it wouldn’t take much after watching her writhe there in the park and feeling her against his hand. He gently grasped her wrist and pulled her hand from his pocket and she looked like she was going to protest but he quickly applied more pressure in his rubbing and she moaned again.

 

This time, it wasn’t quiet. She bucked against his hand and her hands returned to his arm, squeezing against it and digging her short nails into his skin. He didn’t stop, understanding that this was the end of this game they’d been playing. He didn’t care about the noises she was making - something between a moan and a whimper, as if she was enjoying the sensation but she needed more - didn’t care about who could hear them, all he cared about was the expression on her face encouraging him to continue and the feel of her body trying to acquire what it needed to elicit the correct response.

 

They found it a moment later, she was gasping along with the bass in their ears and he thought his name was in there somewhere. He felt the muscles in her legs tense and squeeze against his hand. The heat against his hand was moist and after seconds that felt like an eternity, her body stilled and he stopped moving his hand against her. Every once in awhile a shudder would take over, sending shock waves down through her muscles and he’d feel them tense again. She never let go of his hand, though, and eventually her breathing returned to normal.

 

They lay there like that for a long time, music still pounding in their ears, Kaidan’s hand still between her legs but not moving, Shepard’s arms circling his arm, one hand against his wrist but not moving. Neither one said anything until the sun began to set in the distance. Kaidan reluctantly released his hand from Shepard’s grip and plucked the earbud from his ear, sitting up. He was no longer hard, and didn’t feel uncomfortable about standing and walking out of the park to head home. He helped her fold her blanket, and they each slung their backpacks over their shoulders to start the walk home.

 

As they walked, Shepard’s hand brushed against his and he felt a jolt of electricity just from the barest feel of her skin on his, and knew he’d need to take care of himself when he got home so as not to have any awkward moments during dinner if his mind began to wander. When they got to his house, Shepard stopped and looked up at it thoughtfully.

 

“Is that your room?” she asked, pointing to a window in the front. It was a small house. One story, with two bedrooms and an extra room in the basement, that Kaidan and his mom had converted into his room a few years back.

 

“Um, no, mine’s in the back.” he said, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand, wondering why she wanted to know. “It’s in the basement.”

 

She made a hmmm noise with her mouth and walked around the back of the house, leaving Kaidan with no other option but to follow her.

 

“Is that your window?” she asked, this time pointing to a small window at the base of the house - the one that led to his bathroom.

 

“Uh.. yeah, that goes to my bathroom.” he said, then pointed to the bigger window a few feet to the right. “That one is in my bedroom.”

 

She nodded, looking at the windows as if they were the most interesting things in the world. And then she pushed him against the house and kissed him.

 

It wasn’t like the fast hard kiss she had forced on him in front of Fredericks when she was coming to his rescue from the school bully. The kiss started out hard, but it softened after a moment and he felt her leaning her body against him. Kaidan sunk into the kiss with her, letting her lead the way like she had in the park, since Kaidan’s kissing experience was limited at best. Shepard’s wasn’t something that struck him as experienced either, but she was exploring his mouth with her tongue and while it was a little awkward at first, he felt the growing heat between his legs and wanted more. She was flush against him and he knew she could feel it and he felt slightly embarrassed but she didn’t move and so he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her against him harder. The feeling of her body against him was heaven and he groaned into her mouth without realizing it. Still, she didn’t pull away.

 

When she did pull back, her lips were red and slightly swollen and he missed their pressure against his. Her eyes were dark green and he suspected his were dark brown and he had a momentary feeling that he needed to take her inside and continue this on his bed when she... laughed...

 

“Okay, Alenko... not today.” she breathed in that same voice that drove him crazy and the smirk on her face said she knew it. She slowly pushed off from the wall with her hand, leaving him momentarily shocked by the absence of her weight against him. She was walking away and he wanted to chase her but he was just staring after her, dumbfounded.

 

She turned to him before she rounded the corner of the house, face serious now.

 

“But, hey... leave your window unlocked.”

 

And with that, she disappeared, and Kaidan slid to the ground behind his house staring after the empty space where she had just been, while the events of the day washed over him like a dream... a really, really good dream.


	6. Chapter 6

She didn’t come through his window that night, and Kaidan was somewhat relieved. Not that he didn’t want to see her again - he did so badly - but he was filled with anxiety when he thought about all of the things having her in his room could mean. He didn’t know the first thing about having a relationship with a girl - if that’s even what this was - and he definitely didn’t know anything about sex other than what he’d seen on the internet, and that was hardly a reliable source.

The next morning in Bio he was disappointed to discover she wasn’t there. The day seemed to take a turn for the worse from there. There was a pop quiz that he wasn’t prepared for since he had spent most of his evening going over the events in the park in his mind again and again. Fredricks and his latest cheerleader seemed to be around every corner, calling him names when he passed. And for the icing on the cake, Tali was pissed at him because he had missed the last two saturdays at the library. She wasn’t too pleased when he told her the truth either.

“I’m not jealous or anything, Kaidan.” she said between bites of her pizza at lunch. “It’s just - you could’ve called or something.” she shrugged and she was keeping her voice light but he could tell she was upset. She was right though, he should have called at least.

“I know, Tal, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to just blow you off.” he smiled at her and she finally gave in, sighed, and smiled back. “I’ll make it up to you this Saturday, I promise.” he said, and he meant it, and she seemed to accept his apology.

After lunch he walked her to her next class and was just grabbing his books for study hall when the bell rang. Shit, he thought. The new Earth Science teacher was supposed to be observing study hall and he hadn’t met her yet. Being late was probably not a great first impression. He closed his locker and was about to take off in a run when someone grabbed the sleeve of his hoodie.

He nearly fell right on his face from the pull and when he whirled around to face his attacker he realized it was Shepard. He sighed and she giggled at him.

“What’s the rush, handsome?” she purred at him, winking exaggeratedly when he flushed. He rolled his eyes at her but couldn’t help himself and ended up grinning at her like an idiot. She was leaning with her back against the lockers, one foot on the ground and one back on the locker behind her. She was wearing a simple t-shirt and jeans but he was overcome by how badly he wanted to kiss her in that moment. So he did.

Her hand never left his elbow from where she had pulled him by the sweatshirt, but her other hand went to rest against his hip. He tentatively reached a hand to her cheek, his thumb resting below her lower lip. The pressure he put there caused her to open her mouth and deepen the kiss and she sighed into him, her body relaxing and responding to his touch. It was instinct, pure and simple, he didn’t know what he was doing but it seemed like he was doing it right. It wasn’t sloppy and awkward it was slow and patient and just when he was about to wrap his other arm around her waist and pull her into him, someone to his left cleared her throat.

He dropped his hands to his sides, and Shepard continued her hold on his sleeve as they turned to face the woman who had interrupted them. His first thought was that she was beautiful, much too young to be a teacher, and that she was pissed.

She had chestnut brown hair and stunning blue eyes and her cheeks were littered with freckles, her hand was on her hip and her lips were pursed and she was clearly annoyed with the sight before her.

“Mr. Alenko, is study hall interfering with your private life?” she said in a quiet voice that was anything but soft. He sputtered before being able to answer.

“I - uh - no - I mean - I didn’t mean - I -” he attempted to say he was sorry and it wouldn’t happen again and ma’am and other polite things but he was caught in an awkward situation and wasn’t quite sure how to fix it. Luckily she put him out of his misery.

“Okay, go ahead and take your seat in the room and I’ll be in shortly.” she said, dismissing him, and turning her eyes to his partner in crime. When he looked back to Shepard she was smirking, seemingly not caring about getting caught and he shot her a warning look.

“Now, Mr. Alenko.” the young teacher ordered and he could do nothing but turn away and head to class. Whatever she said to Shepard and whatever Shepard said in reply was a mystery, because they were both whispering too quietly for him to hear.

A few minutes later the woman walked into the room where study hall was held during fifth period.

“Good Afternoon, some of you may know me already from your Science classes, but for those of you who do not - I am Ms. T’Soni.” she said brightly. “I am an archaeology student at UBC and am currently filling in until your school is able to find a replacement Science teacher.” she seemed excited about the prospect of teaching high school students which was something that Kaidan could not understand. “I will be running this study hall until that time as well, and I will ask that you follow a few simple rules during this period. 

She proceeded to list off the basics: no cell phone use, no music, no excessive noise, focus on school work before socializing. When she was done with the rules she flashed Kaidan a bright smile and he flushed a bit before turning his attention to his math homework.

What a weird day, he thought, still tasting the kiss from the hall, still smelling the scent of lavender around him. He smiled to himself, thinking he could get used to weird days.


	7. Chapter 7

Shenko. They had started calling them Shenko, the bullies of the school - though only when Shepard wasn’t listening because as slight of stature as she was, the girl was extremely intimidating. But still, he heard the whispers and the not-so subtle comments from Fredricks, and Tali had told him about it one day at the library.

“Yeah they have a ship name for you.” she had said, expecting him to know what that meant.

“A.. what? A ship?” he had asked, completely confused. She rolled her eyes at him as if he was the dumbest boy who had ever walked the planet - and at that moment he kind of felt that way.

“A ship, Kaidan, it’s when people put two people together as a pair, sometimes they come up with names. You know, like Johnlock.” she said matter-of-factly, in a way that made it clear that Kaidan was supposed to understand now. He didn’t.

“Huh?” he said, getting more confused by the minute.

She sighed heavily. “Jesus, Kaidan, remember how I made you watch Sherlock with me? You loved it!”

“Yeah…” he said, still not getting it.

“John Watson plus Sherlock makes Johnlock.” she said, again expecting it to be enough.

“But, they’re not a couple…” Kaidan said.

“Neither are you and Shepard!” she said, exasperated, and it stung - but it was technically true. “But everyone likes to imagine John and Sherlock are in love, thus Johnlock.” she explained.

“And Shenko?” He asked, wondering if everyone liked to imagine him and Shepard in love.

“Oh, that’s mostly to tease you guys, I think.” she said, focusing back on her book. “It’s catchy though, don’t you think?”

 

* * *

 

 

Thoughts of ships and Johnlock were running through his head while he walked to the park after the library when Shepard ran across the street to meet him, taking his hand in hers and smiling up at him.

She obviously noticed the preoccupied look on his face because she furrowed her brow and gave him a look before asking:

“Something wrong, Alenko?”

He forced a smile and squeezed her hand before responding.

“Nah, just thinking.” he said, keeping the smile firmly in place and she raised an eyebrow at him, making it clear she wasn’t buying it, so he did what any normal awkward teenage boy would do in front of a pretty girl, he blurted out the first thing on his mind.

“When are you going to tell me your name?” he asked, and then a lock of shock crossed his own face because that certainly wasn’t what he was thinking about.

She looked equally taken aback and she stopped walking for a moment, forcing him to stop as well since she still had a firm grip on his right hand.

Shepard stared at her feet for a long time, twisting her hand in his and seeming to try and find the words to what she was going to say. For a fleeting moment he thought she was going to yell at him and go back home, leaving him standing on the sidewalk alone and disappointed. But just then the clouds opened up and it started pouring rain.

They both looked stunned for a few seconds before she tugged at his hand and they started running toward the park. By the time they got to their tree - which thankfully had thick enough covering of leaves and branches that only a few drops made it through - they were soaking wet and shivering. Kaidan sat at the base of the tree and pulled her down with him, so she was sitting between his legs, her legs draped over his right leg and his arms wrapped around her.

He was rubbing her arms with his hands and she was huddling against his chest with her teeth chattering and all at once she burst out laughing. It was a warm sound, inviting, and he cherished every time he had the pleasure of hearing it. When she looked at him, he didn’t laugh with her, but instead kissed her on the nose and she stopped laughing, still smiling and mimicked his action by stretching to place a kiss on his nose.

She leaned against his chest again, staring down at her hands and playing with the zipper of her hoodie and when she said it, the words were barely a whisper and he had to strain to hear them.

“It’s Luna.” she murmured, almost shyly and Kaidan was surprised at this change of character. He was about to ask for more information when she offered it freely.

“My dad is an astrophysicist, one of the things he had in common with my mother was their love of space - stars, planets, all of it. They loved to think about all the things that were waiting for us out there.” she looked up as she said it, though Kaidan knew she couldn’t see the sky past the tree’s covering, he understood the gesture.

“It was silly, I guess, they named me after the moon. I was supposed to be named Jane, but it was a full moon when I was born and they thought it fitting.” she said, almost sadly. He had to agree with her parents, it did seem fitting, she was beautiful and bright and he had a sudden thought that she was a guiding light for him during a dark time of his teenage years and he smiled at the thought. But there was also something sad about her, something that some might perceive as cold, and he could understand that she might be both parts of the moon.

She seemed to push away whatever dark thoughts had been crossing her mind and shrugged.

“I don’t go by Luna because everyone thinks they named me after Luna in Harry Potter, and while I like Harry Potter, I’d rather be associated with the moon, you know?” she asked and he did know so he just nodded.

“So just Shepard in front of people, if you don’t mind.” she said smiling at him, and he nodded again before saying what he had really been wanting to say all along.

“Okay, Luna -” he said and her mouth twitched but she didn’t correct him, they were alone here after all. “Do you want to be my girlfriend?”

She gaped at him, and for a moment he wondered if he had said the wrong thing again but he went back through it in his head and was 100% certain he had said exactly what he’d meant to say. But here she was staring at him like he had grown two heads.

The rain had stopped and she was still staring at him as she shifted in his lap, pushing off of the tree to stand up.

“I - um, did I say something wrong?” he asked, genuinely confused.

She stared for another moment before shaking her head.

“No, I just, I have to think about it, okay?” she said, more of a statement than a question and he could just nod again, wondering why she was so hesitant. Hadn’t she kissed him? Hadn’t she let him… touch her? But he just nodded, because girls were confusing and what else could he do.

“Anyway, I should go and shower before dinner, dad’s going to be wondering why I stayed out in the rain.” she said, staring at her feet again and Kaidan was once again surprised by her new shyness.

“Okay, see you later L-” he paused, “Shepard.” he said to her back because she was already walking hurriedly away.


End file.
